Posted in Journey to Sanity

Journey to Sanity: Day 1


My name is Edwin H Rydberg, and I have a problem.

I’ve become infected by the insanity of the modern world.

I know that complex issues do not have simple solutions. I know that coming up with an answer to such issues requires evaluation of many positions and consideration of many variables. I know that the side any person will take on an issue is dependent on their own perspective, their own experiences, and their own needs. I know that, while my own position seems most logical to me, it doesn’t, and indeed cannot, address all the various concerns held by others. Furthermore, I know that my position is arrived at by prioritizing my own values and that other priorities can be equally as valid.

I know all this, and yet I still become physically overwhelmed by frustration and even anger when faced with those who stand fast to a viewpoint in opposition of mine.

When I step back from the issues of the day that concern me, I ask myself, are these issues new? Are we facing them for the first time, or have they been around before? Are things really as bad as they seem? What is new to us now, and what is just the old wearing a new dress?

When I do this, I find that very little has changed and that history really does seem to be repeating in endless, iterative cycles. Of course, there are new faces, new twists, and especially a new pace to the changes and challenges. But in the end, they are the same old challenges.

I also ask myself, are things really as bad as they seem? Or am I, perhaps, viewing the world through a lense that focusses whatever I lay my gaze upon to the point where it becomes my entire reality?

When I look at all of these questions together and I view them over a longer breadth of history, I find that we have faced them before. Many times. Sometimes we won, sometimes we lost. So far, however, we’ve continued moving in what I consider a positive direction. So, I should take comfort in this continuity.

But I can’t. While I never have trusted the establishment, I now find I no longer trust a large segment of my fellow humans. And I don’t trust history to straighten us out.

That last is lazy and weak in the extreme. Of course, it’s not history that straightens us out, rather it’s the work of tireless people devoted to truth and freedom. And when they fail, it’s the sacrifices of soldiers fighting for what is right.

I think this is where my problem ultimately lies. The victories of our ancestors have led to such a land of luxury and wonder that I find myself without the desire or strength to fight. I don’t think I’m alone in this, and that frightens me because all it takes for evil to prosper is for good people to do nothing.

It also heightens my fear that my child may have to live through the human world once again attempting to destroy itself. Only, this time I’m not sure we could reasonably blame our leaders.

Ultimately, however, I worry that I, like much of the popuation it seems, I am taking things way out of proportion to their danger. So, in order to determine some aspect of the truth for myself, I am attempting to extract myself from world news and pundit commentary for the month of May in order to restore sanity, rediscover perspective, and learn where reason lay.

I will sponsor some of the soldiers fighting for what I believe in through Patreon, and will otherwise withdraw, to experience rhetoric-free life in an attempt to determine the nature of my reality.

I shall report on my journey here.



I'm a writer, publisher, digital artist and web designer. As chief editor of Utility Fog Press I've been responsible for the publication of three anthologies.

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